Unwritten Rules
The tattoo culture is one that has always been something of a mystery to newcomers, the do's and don'ts of what to do have never been mapped out before and people go in blind and break rules they didn't even know about. Some of these rules will instead, be tips and guidelines that should be followed. Feel free to disregard these rules, but do not say you weren't warned!
Rule #1: The Name Curse
So you're in love with someone and it's going to last forever, yes, that's amazing and congratulations, you might even be so in love you want to get the name of your partner permanently written beneath your skin. Let me be blunt so there's no confusion. THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA, DO NOT GET THIS TATTOO. There is a consensus in the tattooing community that once you get your partner's name tattooed on you, the relationship is doomed. If you love someone, and want to stay together, do not get their name tattooed, voodoo is some pretty powerful stuff, don't go messing around with it, or you could ruin the relationship you're in currently and the next three you will be in. But if you're brave/stupid enough to do it, contact me with the result and I hope it works out for the best.
Rule #2: The Basic Teenage Girl Tattoo
We all know the tattoos I'm talking about, everybody has a cousin, aunt or sister with one of these. If you know someone who plans to get a simple black anchor, a feather breaking off into birds, an infinity symbol with the word love or peace or a dream catcher (if it connects to your heritage, then go right ahead) THEN STOP THEM IMMEDIATELY. Okay, you picked a terrible tattoo to get, but don't worry, there's still time. Think over your tattoo, make sure it means something special, it's painful to see the same tattoo four times while walking down the same street, tattoos are about expressing yourself and those designs are too inside the box, but if your heart's set on it, do it, just know that somewhere out there, there's a sixteen year old girl planning to get the exact same tattoo as you.
Rule #3: The Kitchen Tattoo
Yes, we all believe that Jeremy is going to be a great tattoo artist someday and yes, the tattoo equipment he got on amazon was a great deal and yes, that youtube video showing him how to tattoo was very instructional and helpful. Look, we all want our friends to be successful at something they love doing, but that doesn't mean that you need to be their guinea pig and get a terrible tattoo that you'll have for the rest of your life. Do not, I repeat do not get a tattoo from your friends "some guy I know who does tattoos really cheap" referral. THEY NEVER GO OVER WELL and getting anything but a terrible piece of work without infection is a miracle. I understand that forty dollars for a back piece is a great deal Margaret, but that's still pretty expensive for hepatitis. Please, I urge you to seek professional work, at a nice shop, the simple fact is, they know what they're doing. This means that their needles are sterile, their shop is clean and they know how to properly put ink in your skin so you can have a readable tattoo. The amazing kitchen tattoo does not exist, give Jeremy a banana to practice on, not your leg. Remember, tattoos last your whole life, make sure you'll be able to live with it everyday.
Rule #4: The Drunken Tattoo
So you went out drinking with your bros or your girls and had a few too many, this sounds like a great night and should probably be ended soon, by a stop at a pizza shop or falling asleep to your buddy's lauded "best movie ever" that never actually is the best movie ever. However, your drunken night should never end in a tattoo shop, most tattoo parlours are closed at that time, or won't even tattoo a stumbling person who reeks of martini olives or long island iced teas. But some do and to them we can attribute some of the greatest worst tattoos ever to them. Aside from getting a tattoo after a late night at the bars, another thing to avoid is getting drunk before your tattoo appointment, which can seriously affect the outcome of the tattoo. People think that alcohol makes them invincible, and as we've seen from the internet, alcohol does not turn you into a super hero. Alcohol also thins your blood, making it hard for the ink to take hold in the skin, giving you a lighter tattoo that will not have reached it's full potential. Being drunk while tattooed can lead to fidgeting, which messes with the artist's ability to tattoo a straight line, people often throw up while drunk because the pain in combination with the mental state makes people nauseated. Do not be drunk when you should get a tattoo and be drunk when you should not get a tattoo.
Rule #5: Don't Rush
Tattoos are known for their permanency, like seriously, it's like in your skin for a long time. In fact, there's been documented accounts of tattoos staying in the skin for 5000 years, so you have nothing to worry about, it'll be there for a while. Please take your time and do your research before getting a tattoo, it is a big commitment and you should never feel rushed in the process. Think through your tattoo, make sure it's not a fleeting interest and that you can commit to that design. Put a picture of a similar tattoo around your house for around six weeks, then if you're still in love with the design, go get it! Never get tattooed angry, sad or any other emotional state that leads to irrational decisions, It takes time, and think your decision through.
Rule #1: The Name Curse
So you're in love with someone and it's going to last forever, yes, that's amazing and congratulations, you might even be so in love you want to get the name of your partner permanently written beneath your skin. Let me be blunt so there's no confusion. THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA, DO NOT GET THIS TATTOO. There is a consensus in the tattooing community that once you get your partner's name tattooed on you, the relationship is doomed. If you love someone, and want to stay together, do not get their name tattooed, voodoo is some pretty powerful stuff, don't go messing around with it, or you could ruin the relationship you're in currently and the next three you will be in. But if you're brave/stupid enough to do it, contact me with the result and I hope it works out for the best.
Rule #2: The Basic Teenage Girl Tattoo
We all know the tattoos I'm talking about, everybody has a cousin, aunt or sister with one of these. If you know someone who plans to get a simple black anchor, a feather breaking off into birds, an infinity symbol with the word love or peace or a dream catcher (if it connects to your heritage, then go right ahead) THEN STOP THEM IMMEDIATELY. Okay, you picked a terrible tattoo to get, but don't worry, there's still time. Think over your tattoo, make sure it means something special, it's painful to see the same tattoo four times while walking down the same street, tattoos are about expressing yourself and those designs are too inside the box, but if your heart's set on it, do it, just know that somewhere out there, there's a sixteen year old girl planning to get the exact same tattoo as you.
Rule #3: The Kitchen Tattoo
Yes, we all believe that Jeremy is going to be a great tattoo artist someday and yes, the tattoo equipment he got on amazon was a great deal and yes, that youtube video showing him how to tattoo was very instructional and helpful. Look, we all want our friends to be successful at something they love doing, but that doesn't mean that you need to be their guinea pig and get a terrible tattoo that you'll have for the rest of your life. Do not, I repeat do not get a tattoo from your friends "some guy I know who does tattoos really cheap" referral. THEY NEVER GO OVER WELL and getting anything but a terrible piece of work without infection is a miracle. I understand that forty dollars for a back piece is a great deal Margaret, but that's still pretty expensive for hepatitis. Please, I urge you to seek professional work, at a nice shop, the simple fact is, they know what they're doing. This means that their needles are sterile, their shop is clean and they know how to properly put ink in your skin so you can have a readable tattoo. The amazing kitchen tattoo does not exist, give Jeremy a banana to practice on, not your leg. Remember, tattoos last your whole life, make sure you'll be able to live with it everyday.
Rule #4: The Drunken Tattoo
So you went out drinking with your bros or your girls and had a few too many, this sounds like a great night and should probably be ended soon, by a stop at a pizza shop or falling asleep to your buddy's lauded "best movie ever" that never actually is the best movie ever. However, your drunken night should never end in a tattoo shop, most tattoo parlours are closed at that time, or won't even tattoo a stumbling person who reeks of martini olives or long island iced teas. But some do and to them we can attribute some of the greatest worst tattoos ever to them. Aside from getting a tattoo after a late night at the bars, another thing to avoid is getting drunk before your tattoo appointment, which can seriously affect the outcome of the tattoo. People think that alcohol makes them invincible, and as we've seen from the internet, alcohol does not turn you into a super hero. Alcohol also thins your blood, making it hard for the ink to take hold in the skin, giving you a lighter tattoo that will not have reached it's full potential. Being drunk while tattooed can lead to fidgeting, which messes with the artist's ability to tattoo a straight line, people often throw up while drunk because the pain in combination with the mental state makes people nauseated. Do not be drunk when you should get a tattoo and be drunk when you should not get a tattoo.
Rule #5: Don't Rush
Tattoos are known for their permanency, like seriously, it's like in your skin for a long time. In fact, there's been documented accounts of tattoos staying in the skin for 5000 years, so you have nothing to worry about, it'll be there for a while. Please take your time and do your research before getting a tattoo, it is a big commitment and you should never feel rushed in the process. Think through your tattoo, make sure it's not a fleeting interest and that you can commit to that design. Put a picture of a similar tattoo around your house for around six weeks, then if you're still in love with the design, go get it! Never get tattooed angry, sad or any other emotional state that leads to irrational decisions, It takes time, and think your decision through.